Like a Virgin: Stigmatic Societies

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Back in the day when there was shit like slaves and scurvy, fathers often used their daughters’ virginities as a bargaining tool to get food, land – basically pussy was golden currency. Fast forward to today and that isn’t a common practice anymore (thank god), but we still have this idea of ownership when it comes to v-cards. Perhaps because we live in an over-sexualized culture where virgins re sought after – up to a certain age and then cast aside; ironically. A stigma of course played out in movies like The 40-Year-Old Virgin, KELLY CLARKSON! Makes you think, does having sex even make you more of an adult?

It’s no surprise that a woman’s virginity was once good enough to buy a piece of land as a dollar. Ancestors, WTF? That then led us to the idea of taking someone’s virginity, as if you owned them once you had sex with them. Of course only if you were the first.

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Now somewhere between the free love of the ‘70s and Madonna rolling around in white in the ‘80s, sexuality became more and more mainstream. It was no longer something to talk about in secret. Oh hell no, we could gab about orgasms and dildos at Denny’s and two in the afternoon like it was nothing. While the freedom to talk about it was nice, women continued to get the short end of the stick because of the over-sexualization in the media. They were objects to be desired .Joe Rogan recently touched on this in his latest standup special on Netflix, Triggered, when he he spoke of a girl on Instagram who has eight million followers…but posts nothing but her ass. Sex sells and if you aren’t giving or getting it, you’re seen as sort of an odd man out, right?

Because the virgin is still a celebrated entity – to a certain point. It used to be until marriage when people were getting hitched at 19 and 20, but as sex continued to be the norm, the age people started doing it started to decrease. So in turn, now you have adult virgins feeling awkward because they haven’t partaken in any sexual activity other than masterbation.

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In result, some of them feel left out of the adult realm of normalcy, but they shouldn’t because having sex doesn’t make you grown. I knew a couple of nine-year-olds growing up who are sexually active where I grew up, but could they pay their own bills, get a job, or do anything an adult could do other than have sex? No, of course not! So adults out there note, sex isn’t a stepping stone into adulthood. It’s just a human experience that comes sooner or later.

Looking at virginity as something someone else has ownership is just wrong. The only person who owns the copyright to that is you. Also, sex doesn’t make you anymore mature. It just means you’re not a virgin anymore. There’s no special club you become a part of. So if you want to wait, go ahead. Sex will be there when you’re ready. As for the rest of the week…we’ll talk to a woman who is proud of waiting, discuss getting over your first, teen movies and more. So stay tuned!

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