This is likely the one thing everyone has in common, like breathing and eating. Low self-esteem just comes with the territory of existing. That’s not to saw we all suffer from it in the same way, or have it for the same lengths of time – but it’s plausible to believe that at some point everyone will experience it in some way. Whether it’s based on weight, height, blemishes or unruly hair. We’ve all felt like shit over something or other and when it hits, oh lord – it’s like a slump where not even the wise Christina Aguilera song “Beautiful” can lift one out of.
We’re talking like legit low self-esteem here, and not the newfound “just want attention on social media” kind that comes from someone posting a glamour shot on Instagram with the caption, “So fug. Why me. #FML #UGH.” We’re talking about the esteem that’s so low, the person dealing with it can’t see the light in themselves. According to Anneli Rufus’ Unworthy, the following are 12 most common personality traits when it comes to someone with low self-esteem:
- Can’t choose or make a decision
- They often ruin their own fun
- Fake it
- Stuck in the past
- Deflect praise
- Are perfectionists
- Can’t say no
- Can’t stand sight of self
- Assume the worst
- Hates self for hating others
Looking at this list, you can note how many of those you can check off. Me personally? I knocked off more than half. Why? Because I’m human and that’s what we freaking do, but why? Why do we sit and hate ourselves when in reality we could all very well think we’re awesome…It’s hard to say. The media. Can we sit and blame screens both big and small for how we feel? Well, if your self-worth comes with how you look. There have been a number of studies detailing how body image is affected by what we see on a daily basis in commercials and when we head out to the movies. We can also look into how some of us were raised. Siblings who have any sort of rivalry can be affected by it as well. An older brother who is always winning at life can most definitely make his other siblings feel like nothing. There are a number of places to point the blame, but the fact is that we need to get over it.
It’s easier said than done, right? You can either listen to “Beautiful” on repeat or in some cases, head to therapy. My niece, who was nice enough to talk about her battle with low self-esteem this week, recently seeked out help to get her to see the good in herself. It’s only been a short time, but she had admitted it’s helped a bit. You’re not alone in feeling low, so don’t it makes you special. We all feel that way at some point, but some just get out of that self-loathing hole a little sooner than others. It’s just a matter of how and when.
The Highs and Lows of Low Self-Esteem
- According to Self-Confidence, having high self-esteem may be just as bad and has been linked to criminality.
- Look to Tiny Buddha to help with some tips on how to overcome low self-esteem.
- Psychology Today states that self-esteem fluctuates throughout the day.
- Younger people often get into unhealthy behavior due to their low sense of self.
- Low self-esteem comes along with depression and anxiety.
Like I said, we’ll get to know my niece and her struggles, talk about what made me loathe my reflection growing up, get into the Gospel of Degrassi and more.